And Now it is May

May 22^nd to be exact. While I know how that happened (because I am familiar with the nature of linear time), I am not really sure how that happened. 

It was March, and 2023 was moving right along. If I am being honest, I was pretty proud of the organized and productive clip at which the year was moving. It was groovy – right until it wasn’t.

Before I go any further, let me clarify “wasn’t.” I do not mean that all the ways in which chaos entered into my schedule were unpleasant. In fact, some of them were absolutely delightful. I only mean to say that the nice rhythm that I had found for myself did what it often does – it decided it needed a remix. 

Towards the end of March, my tracker spreadsheet that allowed me to analyze my health and wellness goals disappeared during a MacBook update. The synchronization between OneDrive and everything else created a glitch that deleted the file. This happens, so rarely, I never think about it. I thought to re-create it. A tad bit tedious, but worth it in the grand scheme of things…until my niece landed at the Savannah airport with my grandnephew, Michael. I have seen beautiful things in my life. I am not sure how long it’s been since I have been that in all of another living creature.

What followed was an absolutely jampacked April. Rue and I presented at the Southern Regional Honors Conference in Charlotte, North Carolina. I had a baby in my home for two weeks. I spent a long weekend on Lake Wateree, South Carolina, with some of my closest friends for the 2^nd Annual Books with Bitches & Bourbon Bookcation. I began a fight with a nasty kidney infection. I went to Atlanta to be recognized by the University System of Georgia Board of Regents as “the top student at Georgia Southern, the one who best exemplified the system’s highest scholastic ideals.” I was blessed to be a part of a beautiful young woman’s confirmation into the Catholic Church.  I presented and submitted my undergraduate thesis. The kidney infection got worse right before finals and eased up so that I could finish them.

Then it was May. My kidneys were still revolting, and I missed a good deal of the graduation activities. I made it to graduation on painkillers and adrenaline. The next two weeks would consist of ridiculously high fevers, canceled plans, sweat-interrupted sleep, and the inability to do anything more than turn on a movie I had already seen 100 times. 

It is now May 22^nd, and I have been fever-free for 48 hours and enjoyed my first night of uninterrupted sleep after being sick for nearly a month. I feel like I can see my recovered self coming into focus. 

It is easy to sit here and pine over the time that I have lost. I had plans for these last 30 days, some of them pretty important, a few I cannot reschedule or get back. That activity is, however, ridiculous. More than ridiculous, it is pointless and counterproductive. It does not serve me, nor does it serve any other greater purpose that I can identify. So today, I get my life back together without regret for those things that have been missed. Instead, I will be thankful for what I can do today, what I have been able to do, and what these actions will allow me to do tomorrow. 

I do not make up for lost time – I make the present count. 

xoxo,